Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Happy Birthday to Me!

I had a great/terrible day.  My friends made it awesome, but work was really hard.  I can handle hard work, but today was different.  Maybe because I'm 36 hours from knowing all the details of the cancer?  I was just a bit teary all day.

I didn't break down, and I didn't cry.  I'm still OK.  I just keep building my list of questions for the surgeon, and keep on keepin' on.  I know life goes on, and I'm thankful that life goes on.  I'm thankful that I'm still super-busy at work.  However, there are short moments during the day that I wish I could shut down for 3 minutes, cry, and then move on.

I won't, and I'm fine.  I just had a day.  I think the biggest problem was, "Happy Birthday!  You have Cancer!"  That's probably it.  I don't know, but I'm guessing.

I need to get Thursday's appointment over with, so I know what we're up against.  After Thursday morning, I'll be fine.  That's the plan.  Fine.


Donna said...

Yeah, I was handling it fine too, until Maxine called and I said, "Oh, Rachel has cancer."
Reality sucks. Where's that famous bubble of yours?

Rachel said...

Ahhh. The bubble. I'll get it back. I'll ask the surgeon for it, right after I ask him to validate parking. :)

nerves05 said...

I'm still sending good thoughts and prayers your way.
I know you will feel better once you know what your dealing with. The i don't factor i'm sure is hard.
Hang in there. If you need to cry do so. I'm sure it helps relieve built up tension and nerves.
I do hope you had a wonderful Birthday in lieu of.