I have not been posting much lately because I have had an attitude problem for the past several days. Time to get over it. A crappy attitude is NOT going to fix anything. I think I'm done pouting now, and ready to move on. Sometimes you have to say, "What are ya gonna do?" and just go along with what has to be done.
Therefore, I will most likely be going back to work on Tuesday morning. I really wanted to wait until Jaxson's departure, since that will be a pain to deal with, but whatever. He's been holding steady at 50cc per day for nearly 3 weeks. I'm going to the plastic surgeon's office this afternoon just because they haven't seen me in a while and they cannot believe that Jaxson is this stubborn. The record in that office is 7 weeks for a JP drain to stay in, and Jaxson's been around for 5 weeks and 2 days (but who's counting?)
It'll also be good to have them verify that there are no signs of infection from me having it so long. I've been on pretty strong antibiotics since surgery, so I doubt it, but it's worth letting them take a look, anyway. They won't remove it with the output being this high, but maybe they can give me some guidance as to why the amount hasn't dropped in 3 weeks.
I was up until nearly 1:00 am, watching crap on TV. I had an alarm set for 5:30 so the drain amount that I give them today is for exactly 24 hours. (Why did I have to wake up so early yesterday? LOL) The plan was to go back to sleep. So much for plans. Natalie was in my room, watching TV (I sleep in the recliner and Kevin was gone to work) so I spoke to her, and then I instantly started thinking about today's appointment, so sleep was futile.
I started having coffee and doing my typical, early morning internet surfing, and Natalie said she would make some eggs for me. The only problem was, we are apparently out of eggs. Dang. What did she offer to make instead? Or stranger yet, what sounded REALLY good when she offered? Grilled ham and cheese! She fixed one for me and I had some of my mega thin chips with white queso dip, and it was an amazing breakfast! What a sweet kid I have.
Oh, and the coffee we've been having is the best coffee in the world (in our opinion.) It can only be found in Texas, because it's a store brand at HEB. You can order online, but the price gets really high if you do that, so we stock up when we go to Texas, and our Texas friends always bring some along when they visit. The problem is, we haven't been down there in nearly a year, and our friends haven't had the opportunity to visit, so we've been out for quite some time.
Actually, another friend (not from Texas) ordered online and had some sent to us in bulk since we were there last (shout out, 'Shell) but it's been gone for a while. Well, one of my Texas friends (shout out, Susie!) sent a care package recently with SIX bags! It is SO good. I think I'll go refill my cup.
I only have four more hours to kill until we leave for my appointment. *sigh* Wouldn't it suck if they told me I had to quit coffee and chips in order to get rid of this drain? ARGGG! ::shudder:: What a nightmare THAT would be.
Friday, May 25, 2012
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
The Look Good, Feel Better Class
Going to something like a Look Good, Feel Better class is WAY outside of my comfort zone. I'll go to a Mary Kay party or something, but that is usually at the home of someone I know, or I at least know several of the attendees. This was me, going to find out how to take care of bad skin, bad nails, and a bare head (cancer is FUN) with a room full of people I don't know. I also wear very light makeup, and figured the esthetician would push heavier makeup than I usually wear.
I had asked, when I scheduled the class, if one or both of my girls could attend with me. They experiment with makeup a lot, and lately I am half useless without a second set of ears. I was told that guests couldn't come because of patient confidentiality. I completely understand that, so I set out on my own. DEFINITELY outside my comfort zone. I knew NOBODY in that little room. Oh, and each of the other four attendees in the room had someone with them to help/observe. I was the only one alone.
The two hour class lasted only an hour, because the person that teaches wigs, scarves, hats, buffs, etc. wasn't there. That is 90% of the reason I wanted to go. *sigh* They did teach how to draw on eyebrows, which I will need. I plan to teach Monica today so I'll have help when the time comes. All of the skin care products, makeup, etc is donated, so everyone's kit was slightly different, but I bet each contained at least $150 worth of product.
Any time any of us mentioned something that we wouldn't use, the lady told us to take it for someone we knew (my girls will always try new makeup) or we could swap with each other. Heck, two or three of the other ladies gave me several of their things when they found out I had teen girls at home. Everyone was really sweet.
Things I didn't like:
I had asked, when I scheduled the class, if one or both of my girls could attend with me. They experiment with makeup a lot, and lately I am half useless without a second set of ears. I was told that guests couldn't come because of patient confidentiality. I completely understand that, so I set out on my own. DEFINITELY outside my comfort zone. I knew NOBODY in that little room. Oh, and each of the other four attendees in the room had someone with them to help/observe. I was the only one alone.
The two hour class lasted only an hour, because the person that teaches wigs, scarves, hats, buffs, etc. wasn't there. That is 90% of the reason I wanted to go. *sigh* They did teach how to draw on eyebrows, which I will need. I plan to teach Monica today so I'll have help when the time comes. All of the skin care products, makeup, etc is donated, so everyone's kit was slightly different, but I bet each contained at least $150 worth of product.
Any time any of us mentioned something that we wouldn't use, the lady told us to take it for someone we knew (my girls will always try new makeup) or we could swap with each other. Heck, two or three of the other ladies gave me several of their things when they found out I had teen girls at home. Everyone was really sweet.
Things I didn't like:
- I could have taken someone, and was told I couldn't. I would have been so much more comfortable with Monica or Natalie there. I'm sure you aren't supposed to, and the others just didn't ask in advance, so they let them stay.
- The head covering lady didn't show.
- Some of the makeup is WAY dark or heavy for me.
Things I liked:
- The American Cancer Society offers these classes for free (and all over the city.)
- The products sent home are completely free, and are full-sized...not trial sizes.
- They will let you take the class multiple times, but you can only get one kit. That means, I can attend another one later for the part they skipped.
- There were people there with far worse cancers than I have, or on their third recurrence, and it made me very thankful for where I am, physically.
- The girls will LOVE all the cool makeup products that they are going to inherit from this.
- I am always proud of myself when I do something that pushes my boundaries.
Obviously, the good far outweighs the bad. It's an amazing program and I'd never say I'm sorry I went. I will attend another class for the head-covering portion, I'm sure. If you have someone in your life who finds out they are going to face chemo, make sure you tell them about this class.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Missing Girls and Sleeping Upright
My girls aren't really missing, but I was thinking about the name of mom's most recent blog post. The girls are, however, both gone. At 9:30, Natalie walked in and announced that she wanted to spend the night at a friend's house down the street and friend's mom said OK. Why not? Then Monica felt left out, so she contacted her usual hang-out house and headed over there for the night. Welcome to summer in my house.
I was talking on a message board to another lady who has had her JP drain nearly 5 weeks (her surgery was the same day as mine,) and she said that she found out that it would drain less overnight if she slept sitting up more. I've been sleeping in the recliner based on other recommendations, but when I wake up, I'm usually reclined back as far as it will go. She tried sleeping upright and is getting her drain pulled tomorrow.
I'm trying to form a plan that will keep this reclining from happening. I asked Monica to sit behind the chair all night and hold it up, but she declined. Come to think of it, perhaps that's why she left for the night? At this point, I'm willing to give anything a shot. If I wake up lying back too far, I may choose the corner of the couch tomorrow, instead of the recliner.
OK, Monica has called to tell me she made it OK. The distraction of typing this blog post worked. Have a fabulous week!
I was talking on a message board to another lady who has had her JP drain nearly 5 weeks (her surgery was the same day as mine,) and she said that she found out that it would drain less overnight if she slept sitting up more. I've been sleeping in the recliner based on other recommendations, but when I wake up, I'm usually reclined back as far as it will go. She tried sleeping upright and is getting her drain pulled tomorrow.
I'm trying to form a plan that will keep this reclining from happening. I asked Monica to sit behind the chair all night and hold it up, but she declined. Come to think of it, perhaps that's why she left for the night? At this point, I'm willing to give anything a shot. If I wake up lying back too far, I may choose the corner of the couch tomorrow, instead of the recliner.
OK, Monica has called to tell me she made it OK. The distraction of typing this blog post worked. Have a fabulous week!
Friday, May 18, 2012
Jaxson, HFMD, and Job Hunting
Jaxson is a big ol' jerk. The quantity went up, significantly up, yesterday. I almost let it break me. My girls were here to watch season finales with me and keep me from melting into a complete pity pot, although I did post some pretty whiny stuff on Facebook and my favorite message boards.
There is a reason that this is happening. I'm either not supposed to lose this drain yet, or I'm not supposed to start chemo on Tuesday. I don't know what the reason is, but I'm sure there is one, so I'm going to shut my dang mouth about it. Whining will get me nowhere.
I took Natalie to the Minute Clinic yesterday morning. I told them, "She has a sore throat, sores in her mouth and spots on her hands and feet." The nurse practitioner asked, "What are you thinking?" I said, "I think she has Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease." She nodded that she agreed. Then she went to Bing on her computer and looked up the facts that she thought I should know.
The fact that I diagnosed her and they used a search engine didn't keep them from charging the full $25 copay. LOL It's viral, so there's not much we can do other than Tylenol for pain and a prescription mouth rinse that helps with the mouth pain. She is miserable.
I can NOT get this stuff. Seriously. That would cause a whole new batch of problems for me. There is a lot of hand washing going on in this house. LOL Hand washing and complaining (from both of us.)
Monica is out of school for the summer, so the great job hunt is on. She attacks a different nearby town each day. It's amazing how many places won't hire you unless you are 18. I don't remember it being that way, but it's probably a safety issue. I hope she finds something. I'll never forget how great it felt to have that freedom, responsibility, and MONEY! ha ha
OK, If I disappear for a while, it means I have nothing new to say. I don't want anyone to think that my absence means there is a problem. I just find myself turning into a whiny-post person, and I don't want to be that person. I can promise you with 100% certainty that I will post an update the moment I lose the drain. :)
There is a reason that this is happening. I'm either not supposed to lose this drain yet, or I'm not supposed to start chemo on Tuesday. I don't know what the reason is, but I'm sure there is one, so I'm going to shut my dang mouth about it. Whining will get me nowhere.
I took Natalie to the Minute Clinic yesterday morning. I told them, "She has a sore throat, sores in her mouth and spots on her hands and feet." The nurse practitioner asked, "What are you thinking?" I said, "I think she has Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease." She nodded that she agreed. Then she went to Bing on her computer and looked up the facts that she thought I should know.
The fact that I diagnosed her and they used a search engine didn't keep them from charging the full $25 copay. LOL It's viral, so there's not much we can do other than Tylenol for pain and a prescription mouth rinse that helps with the mouth pain. She is miserable.
I can NOT get this stuff. Seriously. That would cause a whole new batch of problems for me. There is a lot of hand washing going on in this house. LOL Hand washing and complaining (from both of us.)
Monica is out of school for the summer, so the great job hunt is on. She attacks a different nearby town each day. It's amazing how many places won't hire you unless you are 18. I don't remember it being that way, but it's probably a safety issue. I hope she finds something. I'll never forget how great it felt to have that freedom, responsibility, and MONEY! ha ha
OK, If I disappear for a while, it means I have nothing new to say. I don't want anyone to think that my absence means there is a problem. I just find myself turning into a whiny-post person, and I don't want to be that person. I can promise you with 100% certainty that I will post an update the moment I lose the drain. :)
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
I Can Drive!
As is typical of me, I do a lot of online research about EVERYTHING. When it comes to something that directly effects my health, you can multiply that research infinitely. I even found an amazing online community to join at http://breastcancer.org/ where you can join in message board type chats, as well as search for answers.
I noticed a lot of folks on there who were driving themselves around, even though they had a JP drain (or multiples) in place. This piqued my curiosity, so I emailed my handy-dandy PS nurse Terri to ask. The only restriction on my driving is the pain pills. What??? I could have been driving for two weeks! As soon as she answered, I jumped in the car and left.
My poor car has been parked under the neighbor's trees for a while, and was so covered in bird dookie that it was hideous. The girls and I laughed pretty hard about it and made the car wash my first stop. Due to a very generous donation, my windshield has been replaced (from the deer damage-no more duct tape) and getting it clean felt great.
From there, we hit Sonic's Happy Hour for drinks, and then to WalMart. It wasn't long before I realized it may have been a bit too soon to run errands on an afternoon in which I had not napped. Seriously? The first day in weeks that I don't nap, and I decide to run around driving? DUH!
I really thought it would be OK, even though I have a standard transmission, since that uses my right arm, and my left arm is the one that doesn't work. WRONG! I guess I actually use my left arm quite a bit. Part of the reason for that is that NOTHING in my car is automatic. Windows, locks, etc all need to be worked manually. With a non-working air conditioner, that meant rolling the windows up and down a few times.
Anyway, I drove. I can drive. I'll be careful not to overdo it, and to maybe go earlier in the day, so I still have time to nap when I get home. In other news: Jaxson only gave up 10cc this morning (after nearly 12 hours) so it's looking like we might have an improvement there, too! Fingers crossed!
I noticed a lot of folks on there who were driving themselves around, even though they had a JP drain (or multiples) in place. This piqued my curiosity, so I emailed my handy-dandy PS nurse Terri to ask. The only restriction on my driving is the pain pills. What??? I could have been driving for two weeks! As soon as she answered, I jumped in the car and left.
My poor car has been parked under the neighbor's trees for a while, and was so covered in bird dookie that it was hideous. The girls and I laughed pretty hard about it and made the car wash my first stop. Due to a very generous donation, my windshield has been replaced (from the deer damage-no more duct tape) and getting it clean felt great.
From there, we hit Sonic's Happy Hour for drinks, and then to WalMart. It wasn't long before I realized it may have been a bit too soon to run errands on an afternoon in which I had not napped. Seriously? The first day in weeks that I don't nap, and I decide to run around driving? DUH!
I really thought it would be OK, even though I have a standard transmission, since that uses my right arm, and my left arm is the one that doesn't work. WRONG! I guess I actually use my left arm quite a bit. Part of the reason for that is that NOTHING in my car is automatic. Windows, locks, etc all need to be worked manually. With a non-working air conditioner, that meant rolling the windows up and down a few times.
Anyway, I drove. I can drive. I'll be careful not to overdo it, and to maybe go earlier in the day, so I still have time to nap when I get home. In other news: Jaxson only gave up 10cc this morning (after nearly 12 hours) so it's looking like we might have an improvement there, too! Fingers crossed!
Monday, May 14, 2012
And Here is Another Week
Wow. Another Monday is here already. I slept a LOT yesterday. Recent surgery or not, I slept so much I felt guilty! I would wake up for an hour or so, think I was done napping, and then BAM, back to sleep for another couple of hours. I didn't feel as bad as I did on Saturday, but I sure was tired. The day ended with a visit from coworkers bearing meals. Yum is an understatement.
This morning, I decided to rest as needed, but NOT sleep the day away. We'll see how THAT goes. LOL Heck, it takes an hour to shower and get dressed, 20 minutes to go to the post office and back, and then it's time for this important internet-type stuff. :) By then, the day is half over, so I think I have a solid plan to prevent non-stop sleep.
I've got Jaxson down to double digits, but we still have a way to go before I can get rid of him. Yesterday was 53cc. The day before that was 87, so I'm hoping yesterday wasn't a fluke (because that's a huge drop.) It has to be under 30cc for two days straight before they can remove it. I am SO flippin' tired of dealing with it. Tired to the point that I tear up as I'm trying to shower or get dressed or change clothes. Of all the things that are horrible about cancer, who would have thought a stupid drain could cause this much grief?
I guess I'll go email my nurse the Jaxson status and see what she says. Fingers crossed...
This morning, I decided to rest as needed, but NOT sleep the day away. We'll see how THAT goes. LOL Heck, it takes an hour to shower and get dressed, 20 minutes to go to the post office and back, and then it's time for this important internet-type stuff. :) By then, the day is half over, so I think I have a solid plan to prevent non-stop sleep.
I've got Jaxson down to double digits, but we still have a way to go before I can get rid of him. Yesterday was 53cc. The day before that was 87, so I'm hoping yesterday wasn't a fluke (because that's a huge drop.) It has to be under 30cc for two days straight before they can remove it. I am SO flippin' tired of dealing with it. Tired to the point that I tear up as I'm trying to shower or get dressed or change clothes. Of all the things that are horrible about cancer, who would have thought a stupid drain could cause this much grief?
I guess I'll go email my nurse the Jaxson status and see what she says. Fingers crossed...
Saturday, May 12, 2012
The Jaxson Saga and Mother's Day
Wow, no post since Wednesday must mean no news, huh? That, and I'm keeping weird hours. I've never known anyone to sleep as much as I have been sleeping lately. Other than a baby, perhaps. I'm not complaining, however. I am learning to adore a good nap or three during the day.
Jaxson seems to finally be slowing down. 94cc on Thursday, and 83cc on Friday. Keep going that direction, buddy. I may get rid of you before the week is out, which is actually imperative, since I am to start chemo the following Tuesday, and cannot start chemo until Jaxson is out of the picture.
Today, we're going to have a Mother's Day meal of burgers and dogs on the grill. Brett and Melissa are coming over and bringing the kids. I can't WAIT! It's been weeks since I've seen them. Even Kaylie is coming, and she NEVER makes it. I stocked up on bubbles and sidewalk chalk, so we should make it a great day.
Jaxson seems to finally be slowing down. 94cc on Thursday, and 83cc on Friday. Keep going that direction, buddy. I may get rid of you before the week is out, which is actually imperative, since I am to start chemo the following Tuesday, and cannot start chemo until Jaxson is out of the picture.
Today, we're going to have a Mother's Day meal of burgers and dogs on the grill. Brett and Melissa are coming over and bringing the kids. I can't WAIT! It's been weeks since I've seen them. Even Kaylie is coming, and she NEVER makes it. I stocked up on bubbles and sidewalk chalk, so we should make it a great day.
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