Today marks a year since I got the call, confirming my suspicions of breast cancer. With the help of an amazing team of doctors, I threw everything I could at the beast, and I feel I beat it. This week's mammogram on the remaining breast came out "all clear," which was an amazing relief. They tested 10 lymph nodes during my mastectomy, and three of them were positive for those pesky cancer cells.
When it's in your lymph nodes, it is easily carried to other parts of your body. This is the annoying thing that keeps me on my guard. Knowing that, even though chemotherapy ended six months ago and radiation ended four months ago, I had a clear mammogram. That is comforting.
I've been pulled off of Tamoxifen, the hormone suppressing drug, because of my swelling and other symptoms. An echo-cardiogram has been ordered for next Friday morning to make sure my heart hasn't been damaged. I had one before my surgery that was good, so we have a baseline for comparison. Worrying won't help, so I'll just wait.
All of my kids will be together on Wednesday evening, and I'm really looking forward to that. It's a black-out week at work, so I couldn't take any time off, but Kevin was able to. We'll try to do some fun stuff with them. I'm glad there is something positive and fun for me to focus my attention on. The bottom line is, I've survived a horrible year. And I'm stronger for it.
Showing posts with label heart. Show all posts
Showing posts with label heart. Show all posts
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Stupid Medical Crap
I'm so done with medical issues! I had my annual ob-gyn appointment today. Just routine. Well, except that it is at last year's appointment that I talked to her about the lump, and it was at last years appointment that she ordered the mammogram that resulted in the biopsy that happened a year ago today. Yeah. Except for that.
My gynecologist's office is down the hall from the cancer center. This means that I entered the same building and took the same elevator to the same floor. I was fine this morning, but by the time I got to the office and signed in, I was nervous as heck. Stupid.
They called me back, I got changed into the gown, and I waited. Forever. When Dr. Finkle came in, she said, "So, how are you doing, really?" That's when I broke down crying. I'm so done. I'm done with appointments, I'm done with poking and prodding, and I'm done with questions. I love her dearly, and she's the reason that cancer didn't win. I'm not mad at her, I'm just down.
So we talked and she wants to have me try Effexor, which should alleviate the hot flashes and help with anxiety at the same time. I'm willing to try. I've been a nightmare to my family for a while now. Everyone that I know is on my last nerve. The common denominator is me. I hope it helps. But we didn't get to complete that conversation, because that's when she started my exam by looking at my legs.
"Your legs are SO swollen? How long have they been like that? Why didn't you say anything?" Umm, because it's no biggie to me compared to cancer? Because I'm fat and I figured that was to blame? Because I'm sick of reporting medical complications? I don't KNOW! She completed the exam and then looked at my legs again. She said I wasn't leaving until she decided what she was going to do.
After getting dressed, I opened the door. She met me at the door and said, "I've decided how we're handling this." It could be a blood clot, or a heart issue, or just fluid retention. She ordered an immediate ultrasound of my legs to rule out clots and I headed downstairs to complete that. My oncologist was not in the office, but she will call her and get me in sooner than my March 19th appointment. She will let my oncologist decide where to send me to rule out heart issues.
The ultrasound showed no clots. That was my biggest worry. Those can mean instant death. I have no blood clots. PHEW! I'll get a call tomorrow with information about what to do next. Damn. I'm SO sick of this stuff. I was in a funk before this, and now I have to concentrate on not letting it pull me down further. I have a great week ahead of me, and that's what I plan to concentrate on.
My gynecologist's office is down the hall from the cancer center. This means that I entered the same building and took the same elevator to the same floor. I was fine this morning, but by the time I got to the office and signed in, I was nervous as heck. Stupid.
They called me back, I got changed into the gown, and I waited. Forever. When Dr. Finkle came in, she said, "So, how are you doing, really?" That's when I broke down crying. I'm so done. I'm done with appointments, I'm done with poking and prodding, and I'm done with questions. I love her dearly, and she's the reason that cancer didn't win. I'm not mad at her, I'm just down.
So we talked and she wants to have me try Effexor, which should alleviate the hot flashes and help with anxiety at the same time. I'm willing to try. I've been a nightmare to my family for a while now. Everyone that I know is on my last nerve. The common denominator is me. I hope it helps. But we didn't get to complete that conversation, because that's when she started my exam by looking at my legs.
"Your legs are SO swollen? How long have they been like that? Why didn't you say anything?" Umm, because it's no biggie to me compared to cancer? Because I'm fat and I figured that was to blame? Because I'm sick of reporting medical complications? I don't KNOW! She completed the exam and then looked at my legs again. She said I wasn't leaving until she decided what she was going to do.
After getting dressed, I opened the door. She met me at the door and said, "I've decided how we're handling this." It could be a blood clot, or a heart issue, or just fluid retention. She ordered an immediate ultrasound of my legs to rule out clots and I headed downstairs to complete that. My oncologist was not in the office, but she will call her and get me in sooner than my March 19th appointment. She will let my oncologist decide where to send me to rule out heart issues.
The ultrasound showed no clots. That was my biggest worry. Those can mean instant death. I have no blood clots. PHEW! I'll get a call tomorrow with information about what to do next. Damn. I'm SO sick of this stuff. I was in a funk before this, and now I have to concentrate on not letting it pull me down further. I have a great week ahead of me, and that's what I plan to concentrate on.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
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